


wish i were daichi | oisuga

by elsangi



Series: the heather chronicles [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Get ready for angst, I'm Sorry, M/M, Oop, Please Don't Kill Me, Sad Oikawa Tooru, The Author Regrets Nothing, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, heather au, i'll try to give it a happy ending, last time i said that i lied
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-15
Updated: 2020-10-15
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:48:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,707
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27025303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elsangi/pseuds/elsangi
Summary: so this is another heather fic.
Relationships: Oikawa Tooru/Sugawara Koushi, Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi
Series: the heather chronicles [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1971310
Kudos: 24





	wish i were daichi | oisuga

**Author's Note:**

> ik i said that i'd give kagehina a happy ending but i lied lmaooooo s u f f e r
> 
> but here take this angst

**oikawa pov**  


**  
**

"hey ko-chan!" i called out as i saw him, walking towards the cafe we were going to. it was december 3rd and we decided to go study together since both of our schools decided to give us extra homework. fucking bitches. i was dumb (not that i would ever admit that) and forgot to bring a sweater and asked ko-chan to bring one for me because i didn't have time to run back home and grab one. i was apparently immune to cold because i didn't realize that i didn't have my sweater until i was almost at the cafe and it would take longer for me to double back rather than ask ko-chan if he could lend me a sweater. "hey tooru!" he said, walking up to me. "here's your sweater." he handed me a gray sweater that matched with his hair very well. "thanks ko-chan!" i said. as i put on the sweater, i realized that the sweater smelled just like him. _maybe i could steal it from him. it smells nice._ i'd liked him for a while now, but i'm trying to suppress my feelings since it's obvious he likes daichi.

  


"hey tooru, keep the sweater. it looks better on you than it does on me!" i blushed. "ko-chaaaaaan. don't tease me like that. we both know you're the better looking one." he raised his eyebrow. "oikawa tooru saying that someone looks better than he does? what a surprise!" i groaned and pushed him into the cafe. "get me an iced-" i cut him off. "an iced coffee, medium sized. i know your order mr. refreshing." he rolled his eyes and smiled. i went to go stand in the line and when i got to the front, i told the barista our order. i paid for both coffees and stood off to the side waiting. ko-chan had said that this sweater looks better on me than it does on him. it was a platonic compliment, of course, but i had a crush on him. so that little, probably meaningless compliment, meant a lot more to me. "oikawa-san?" the barista said. she was holding out two coffees. "thank you!" i took the coffees and headed to the table that ko-chan picked out.

  


i heard the bell on the door ring and saw sawamura-kun come in. i immediately looked at ko-chan. his eyes were bright and shining. i felt cracks in my heart. _ouch. would he ever look at me like that?_ it was a sight for my sore eyes. his eyes were so bright, brighter than the bluest sky, even. "daichi!" he called out and waved. i felt the cracks getting bigger. sawamura-kun came over and greeted me, before turning to ko-chan. they began to have a conversation, completely forgetting i was there. sawamura, as always, has ko-chan mesmerized. he's hanging onto every word spewing out of sawamura-kun's mouth. i took out my laptop while they were talking and pulled up the tab for my notes, assignments, and music. i plugged my headphones in and started the music. i think i'm the only person who can study/do homework with band music on. i know for a fact that ko-chan will just forget about studying and start vibing to the song instead. i started playing my playlist with the neighbourhood songs. sweater weather was the first song, even with the playlist on shuffle.

  


i saw sawamura-kun straighten up as if he was going to go order his coffee. and he did. he walked over to the barista and ordered an americano. at least i think that's what he ordered. ko-chan told me that that's what he usually orders. when he got his coffee, which actually turned out to be an americano, i saw ko-chan blow him a kiss goodbye. sawamura-kun blushed and waved. he pushed the door open and got into his car and left. i was jealous of sawamura-kun. i'm sure anyone would be able to see that. would ko-chan ever blow me a kiss goodbye like that? yeah, he does it all the time and i do it back but it's all platonic. but when he does it to sawamura-kun, i can sense the non-platonicness of it. why would he ever do that for me? 

  


i would never admit it, but sawamura-kun has something that i don't. i can sense it. i wouldn't say it's his looks, but there's something about him that draws everyone in. he's a strong captain, a strong foundation for his team. i'm not even half of what he is when it comes to our teams. i have a killer serve and a killer set but he supports the team at the very bottom, but in a good way, if you know what i mean. 

  


a few days later, i was walking to the cafe again, wearing ko-chan's sweater. i saw ko-chan get out of his car- wait what? ko-chan didn't have a car. i squinted at the person i though was ko-chan. it was _sawamura-kun_ getting out of his car, probably going to the same cafe again. _why the hell did i think it was ko-chan?_ i wondered. i ended up behind him in line. he still hasn't seen me. i was staring at his back because there was nothing better to do. i mean, he was behind me in line! then it struck me. i suddenly realized why i thought it was ko-chan. sawamura-kun was wearing ko-chan's sweater. specifically, the one ko-chan was wearing a few days ago during our study date. _it's just polyester. he gave you his sweater too! that didn't mean anything!_ a hopeful side of me said. _yes he gave you his sweater as well but you know DAMN well that he likes sawamura-kun more than he likes you._ another side of me thought. _i'm really starting to wish i was sawamura-kun._ a finally part of me thought. 

  


i was at the park later that day and saw ko-chan and sawamura-kun hanging out. they were standing together and sawamura-kun had his arm wrapped around ko-chan's shoulder. ko-chan was hugging sawamura-kun's waist. i felt the cracks in my heart getting a tiny bit bigger. it hurt. it really hurt. i felt myself shiver. i wasn't even that cold. i mean, it was chilly but ko-chan's sweater was plenty warm. i bit my lip. _should i leave before they see me?_ i leaned against the tree i was next to and sighed. i wanted to hate sawamura-kun for "stealing my mans" but i couldn't bring myself to. just hating him because my crush likes him is unreasonable and i try not to be unreasonable. he's probably really sweet. i haven't been able to talk to him very long and i don't know him well, other than what ko-chan's told me and it's obvious that he's extremely biased. but then again, i want sawamura-kun to disappear so i can steal ko-chan for myself. okay, that's a little dramatic but you know what i mean.

  


then i saw sawamura-kun lean in. my breath hitched, but not in a good way. i clenched my fists, trying not to cry. ko-chan's eyes were even brighter than they were before, at least, that's what i saw before he shut them and pressed his lips against sawamura-kun's. i sank down to the ground. _my crush kissed his crush. good for him, bad for me._ i felt a tear streak down my face. i stood up and exited the park, eager to get home before more tears escaped. images of ko-chan's bright eyes flashed in my mind as i went home. they were so bright, brighter than the bluest sky, way brighter than that. i knew that i'd lost the possibility of ko-chan ever liking me back forever. he looked so calm at the moment sawamura-kun kissed him. he's got him mesmerized.

  


i went into my room and sat down. the tears began freefalling without my permission. _why would he ever kiss me?_ i was thinking about the party we went to last year. we dared to kiss each other. that little kiss had sent sparks down my body and my crush started right around then. i was dumbfounded that he didn't feel repulsed by kissing me. that's why i even thought i had a chance in the first place. but it turns out that i'm not even half of what sawamura-kun was. ko-chan told me about his crush at the beginning of our third year. it didn't hurt too much because one, he and sawamura-kun were _adorable_ together. two, i still had a slight chance if ko-chan lost feelings for him or if he rejected ko-chan. but ko-chan gave both of us his sweaters. we'd been best friends for years so of course he would give me one. ko-chan had the biggest crush on sawamura-kun so it's obvious why he'd give him his sweater. 

  


i know it's polyester and that polyester is platonic and involves no feelings. but that kiss meant something a lot more. any idiot would see that. tears began to stream down even faster. it doesn't matter that it's just polyester anymore. ko-chan likes him better and i wish i was sawamura-kun.

  


i spent the next day in my feelings. i didn't talk to anyone, although ko-chan did call me. i'm sure it was to tell me that sawamura-kun kissed him. i texted him and told him that i was sick and that iwa-chan was taking care of me and that he didn't need to come over. after that, i continued to cry. the cracks in my heart were no longer cracks. my heart shattered the moment i saw them kiss. the kiss at the party from last year replayed in my head all day. so did the kiss at the park. _why would he ever kiss me?_ that kiss has been fucking up my feelings for the past year. but now, i know that i'm not half of what sawamura-kun is. yes ko-chan did give both of us sweaters. but you know what? his act to me was platonic. his act to sawamura-kun was not. he likes him better, and even though right now i wish i were sawamura-kun, overtime, that feeling will hopefully fade.

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoyed! i tried to focus on other elements, not just the heather song to make it seem like an actual story and not just h e a t h e r.


End file.
